It’s not considered polite to complain all the time but I am going to give myself a pass today. Plus, I thought the colorful, Southern way I described life’s situational detriments sounded fun!

So why am I complaining like my light at the end of the tunnel got cut off due to non-payment? Y’all I am on some serious medicines that are no fun. I am on what the professionals call quadruple therapy for Idiopathic Pulmonary Arterial Hypertension…and no, idiopathic is not a reflection on my personality or capabilities in any way even though some of my closer family members like to shorten that word.

Anyways, I started out 5 years ago with a central line that was connected directly to my heart. Yes, it was as scary as it sounds because the medicine was pumped through a large device (about the size of one of those old cassette players we used to carry around) through a tube from the outside to the inside of your body 24/7.

After about a year of that business, I developed a blood infection that put me in the hospital for several weeks and literally scared me to death. Thats when I went to something similar, not straight to my heart but in a subcutaneous method. The side effects can be brutal, especially on the skin area surrounding where you decided to place your port. Being the rare, delicate flower I am, insert eye-roll at your own leisure, I am also allergic to adhesive so I have to move mine more often. Ultimately, it still allowed me to have a little more freedom with daily life.

I am on two other oral medications that are vasodilators, several diuretics, and an injection I take every three weeks in my stomach. Luckily I was trained to give these on my own so I don’t have to drive three hours to my specialist. Another plus is I have really great specialty pharmacies that ship accordingly. For example, most local hospitals are not familiar with medications I am on so that can be a booger in an emergency.

Back to the point, I have been feeling horrible the past few weeks. I know to expect fatigue and certain gastro issues from unforgiving meds but I was worrying because you have to differentiate from medicine side effects, all the bugs and viruses that are traveling like it’s Spring Break in Florida, disease progression (which is super scary), or just regular 50 year old woman stuff.

“I am an old Southern woman, and I am supposed to wear funny clothes, ugly hats, and dig in the dirt. I did not make the rules.”

-Oiser Boudreaux

I go through phases of trying to maintain and others I just “take to the bed.” BUT exciting news! I still wake up everyday, hug Reba and kiss Sissy goodbye, know I have family and friends that let me complain (be easy on them every once in awhile because it can be a whole lot to hold on to for them as well), and a feeling of gratitude for the things and people I have in my life.

And guess what! I am feeling pretty good today:) I changed a few eating habits recently and the benefits are finally kicking in a little. And that is super hard to do in a part of the country where macaroni and cheese is considered a vegetable!

Hugs and Thanks!

Wendy